Start: The Charleston, 174 Bedford Ave, Brooklyn
Transit: L train to Bedford Ave
Hare: Doggie Erectus assisted by Mouthful of Gu
On In: R Bar
Scribe: Eager for Beaver
The last month or two of Brooklyn hashes have occurred during apocalyptically bad winter weather, and/or when the hare became debilitatedly drunk prior to setting trail. Luckily, ‘or’ was tonight’s keyword, as the hare seemed to be relatively sober at the start. Unfortunately, temperatures were to get to 0 – that’s in Fahrenheit, which means it was really fricken cold, as opposed to 0 Celsius “sorta chilly” – once wind chill was figured in. So if you were looking for a reason to skip tonight’s trail, the fact that North Brooklyn was covered in an thick, angry sheet of ice would have been a good reason.
A second good reason would have been because the hare forgot to bring chalk for the pack. So don’t dawdle at the check, don’t check the wrong direction – whatever you do, don’t get left behind, cause finding the pack again would suck without any marks. And if you were hoping that the on in would have been written, as we do, at the start, guess again.
Although Six Inches, Ladies did try to mark trail in snow, by the time Just Trevor arrives it had melted to a watery approximation of a directional arrow… pointing somewhere. Nice try though.
I’d go into more detail about how the trail went this way and that, but honestly with there was no way I was going out in the cold. By the time I arrived in the neighborhood, Smash Mouth was just passing me, shouting and gesticulating as though tI couldn’t see the friendly R Bar sign from the short 10 feet away where I stood.
The pack was a typical winter Brooklyn group: dude heavy and cold. Of course, Noah’s Dinghy, inappropriately, wore shorts. Spits Then Swallows sent a mysterious message to Cheeky by way of a decapitated, stuffed horse head. Doggie, mysterious in his own way, disappeared for an uncomfortably long time – long enough to bring back a single pizza for the hungry pack.
As Smashmouth waited for the bus, we commenced with circle:
Ivory Dickler, for hitting on Joan Baez at last weekend’s NYC hash.
Smashmouth, for being the RA on duty when the L train stopped working for everyone.
Ivory Dickler for DFL and the Hare for forgetting chalk at the start
Just Trevor, for slipping on the ice.
Speedo, for reading his story in public about bathroom sex
With that, the bus arrived to whisk Smashmouth home, and for the rest of the pack to enjoy their remaining beers in relative peace.