*This BH3 doubleheader writeup is brought to you by the good people at Brooklyn's own Blank Slate Drywall Company. If it isn't good enough to be used as a chalk substitute, then you may need some other means of setting trail, buddy.*
Start: St. John's and Flatbush
On In: Double Windsor
Hares: Splat! and Bushy
Trail #1 featured a fair bit of r*nning in Prospect Park. It may surprise some of you to hear that there is a park large enough for a trail in Brooklyn, but rest assured, this verdant oasis will not be neglected on future hashes. Would that we had only found it sooner, the more advantage we could have taken of its spacious green pastures, tree-lined pathways, and numerous drug offerings. The trail itself wound through the heart of Grand Army Plaza, the soul of the East Drive, the fringes of the Long Meadow, the tailbone of the lake, and into the liver of the hash at the Double Windsor. Splatus Maximus decreed that it was a London Rules scenario, and so we all assumed our fake teeth and fake accents for the occasion. Still, circle was convened at the appointed hour for these down-downs:
Hares- for the trail, and for forgetting to hand out chalk. Who needs chalk when you can have drywall? (for appropriate effect, please reference the opening headline)
Nicole- dodging the pantsless man in the park. He just wanted to invite her to the pants party
Screaming O- DFL, for Dead Fucking Last, or, Drywall For Life (see above)
Conelingus- r*nning shirtless; creeping on a civilian. The two points may be related
Splat!- not understanding it's dark at night. Who does, these days?
And then there was round two, the following Monday:
Start: Cadman Plaza
On In: The Levee
Hare: Piece of Slut
We again found ourselves running around a plaza, this time, not Grand Army, but Cadman, near the base of the Brooklyn Bridge. We fought its powerful pull, but in the end, found marks leading on to its pedestrian pathway, and were sucked over into Manhattan. We cruised on the up and up, bypassing the Manhattan, and reentering Brooklyn's atmosphere via the Billyburg. Trail meandered over to The Levee, which was reached simultaneously by two distinct groups of hashers – see down-down number three as to the reason why. Here they are in full digital ink:
Hare- for the trail and as there were 2 bridges, 2 more down-downs
Smashmouth- helping 2 tourists at base of Brooklyn Bridge. For his grammatical dressings-down, they stared at him blankly, as blankly as a sheet of Blank Slate Drywall.
Blackout/Just Nicole/Just Mika/Dogface- ran exclusively in Brooklyn
Blackout and Cheeky Bastard- comparing lining of their shorts
Lexi's Bitch- asking, "are we there yet?" on each bridge
Technically Foul- overachieving, r*nning across the Brooklyn Bridge twice
Lexi's Bitch/Noah's Dinghy/Technically Foul/Rack n Roll Her- for watching a kung fu video in Chinatown instead of checking. This video was also brought to you by Blank Slate Drywall.
Doubleheader complete. On-on!