Saturday, September 17, 2011, 3pm
NYCH3 #1445, 14th An*l Red Dress Run
Start / Dressup & Makeup Area / On-In: Fontana’s Bar, 105 Eldridge St. between Broome and Grand
Hares: Punk A$$ Bitch, Salt Lick, Head Up A$$ & Flabio
Circle Emcee: Pimpy Longstocking
Scribe: Doggie Erectus
We gathered at Fontana’s Bar to don our gay apparel. And to put on our wigs and paint our nails…
Needless to say, it was going to be a huge mass of drunken red confusion. Fontana’s is on a small street near Chinatown and the locals were all stopping to gawk and take pictures as we filed out of the bar for a few group photos.
After we had all the pics we needed, we hit the trail. It took us through the Feast of San Gennaro where we passed a crowd watching someone speak on stage. They invited the whole pack up on stage for a round of applause which we gladly accepted
Then we went through Washington Square Park where many of us ran through the fountain
Skidmark found on a sofa on trail and was carried like Cleopatra on her litter by the pack for a while
We eventually found our way back to Fontana’s and gave out Down-Downs:
The Hares: Punk A$$ Bitch, Salt Lick & Flabio
Visitors & Virgins: Too many to count
The "You came to a Red Dress Run without a dress" award was given to 3 wankers
Punk A$$ Bitch, Salt Lick, Head Up A$$ & Flabio took over circle at this point to give out the Red Dress Awards
Best Boobs (female): Just Darlene
Best Boobs (male): Just Matt
Most uncomfortable costume: Skidmark in his bloomers and bustier
Ugliest costume: Gabe the Babe
The Ed Lynch is a homosexual award was awarded to: Ed Lunch
Camel Toe Jumpsuit Award: Yank It My A$$ Hurts
Best A$$: Shock the Beaver
Mr. Red Dress: I Feel Tower
Miss Red Dress: Just Leslie
We liked Leslie’s outfit so much we named her Bam-Bam Thank You Ma’am
It was really nice having my nails done by a harriette before trail. We should have had a post-hash makeup removal party too. It was a little awkward stopping in to the drug store on my way home to buy nail polish remover.
On-Out!