Special #50 – Prospect Park fundraiser hash – New York City Hash House Harriers

Special #50 – Brooklyn H3 + NYCRUNS.com r*n for Prospect Park Alliance

Saturday November 21, 2009

Hares: FMIG and Headlights

Start: Grand Army Plaza

On-in: 4th Avenue Pub

Scribe: Canine Fixation

Although Saturday afternoons are usually for hangover recovery from the night before, a group of 30+ hashers managed to tap into the goodness of their heart and drag their asses out to Grand Army Plaza to hash for the Prospect Park Alliance. Well, the goodness of their hearts and a thirst for more beer (gotta kill that hangover somehow). The hares promised the shiggiest trail possible in New York filled with dead animals, animal feces, human feces, the homeless, and other pleasant surprises. As we were still in Brooklyn, there was some understandable skepticism among the hashers as we set off.

True to its intentions, the trail immediate took us into Prospect Park where the normally road-r*nning hashers came face to face with dirt trails, hills, and various other non-concrete surfaces. It was a novel experience as we hiked up hills, r*n through meadows, and hopped over fences trying to follow the dollops of flour. After many a shoes have gotten thoroughly mud and shit-caked, we left the park and made our way up Park Slope in an otherwise conventional second-half of the hash. After a mile or two on the streets, the pack arrived at the on-in, the 4th Avenue Pub where many delicious cold beers and two giant bagel sandwiches (courtesy of La Bagel Delight) awaited them.

Down-downs were awarded/punished as such:

FMIG and Headlights for setting trail (and through actual trail at that).
FMIG – For his part in the NYCRUNS.com portion of this trail.
Virgins – Rachel who made herself come and Karen who came with Rachel.
Robbie – was mistaken for a virgin by FMIG even though she’s hashed 12 times already. Don’t know why she’s getting the down-down, but that’s hash justice for you.
Screaming O + Blackout – Finally got their down-down for the couple of the year award at the AGM a month or so back.
Smashmouth – Called the cops on a couple on trail.
Baboon Ass – Apparently saw some guy giving another guy a blowjob in the park. FMIG, true to form and name, then pointed out that the trail ran through the gay part of Prospect Park.
Death Breast and Erin and Amy – Followed trail arrows trying to get to the start.

As there was still a fair amount of down-down beers at this point, the nominations came fast and loose (my notes start to degenerate at this point):

Dogface called out FMIG for his claim that this was the shiggiest trail possible in New York. Apparently you can get shiggier out in Staten Island. Also, hotline was not set for a while.
FMIG called out Dogface for "forgetting to send email for hotline".
The Saint called out Smashmouth who donated a Chrysler to the PPA a few years ago
She’s a Dude called out Canine Fixation and Stewa for stepping in some of the promised animal shit.
Sandy Syphilis called out Canine Fixation for taking notes of the circle on a clipboard. I’ll be sure to provide you with only FMIG’s notes next time you do a writeup then.
Someone called out FMIG for being an asshole.
Someone called out Rack ‘n Rollher and Candy Stripper for comparing Garmins.
FMIG called out P-DickyimeanWhoremaster "for being there".

With the down-down beers finally exhausted, the circle broke and the hashers turned their attention towards the giant bagel sandwiches and the bar. Even though some of the money was set aside for PPA, the hash cash kept the beers flowing for a long time. This is a concluding sentence.

On out,

Canine Fixation