November 25, 2007
Hares: Cockstar & Pussy Repellent
Start: 96th and Broadway
On In: O’Connells (108th and Broadway)
Another sunny but brisk November Sunday, another good hash.
There wasn’t the largest turnout ever for the Turkey Day weekend hash, but veteran hashers Cockstar and Pussy Repellent were sure to set a good trail and provide lots of beer at the on-in, so the smart hashers in town were there. Sure enough the hares didn’t disappoint.
The trail started in the UWS, and was a good one, wandering around wild areas of Central Park before exiting on the north side, and wandering on the edge of, then into Morningside Park. In both parks there were checks which were solved by taking the high road…lots of stair climbing this day to work off some of that turkey. The trail then wandered through Columbia-land, across its main thoroughfare, before ending a bit south at O’Connells, where there are always a few central booths to crash in, and the Bud pitchers are always dirt cheap.
The circle started rather slowly, with the usual drinks for the hares, though the trail was too good to have any real complaints. There was a single virgin, Marybeth, and two visitors. Of these last two, I forget the name of one, but then again so did he (you had to have been there). The other was 9 and ½ Wanks from San Francisco. The Philadelphia marathon crew, about 5 or 6 of us, were given down-downs. Next were some down-downs for an attempted theft on trail, but having not heard the entire story it was unclear to me whether Hot Rod was the victim, and Lunch the hero who fought off the assailant, or whether it was Lunch who attempted the theft. Since its doubtful that Hot Rod was r*nning with pizza on trail, I assume the first scenario. Mean Jean was sent up next. Cockstar had tasked MJ with watching Pa Naidech, in town for the holiday…apparently Mr. Naidech has hashed a few times previously, but always managed to get lost on trail. Well, Mean Jean failed in her task, and sure enough Mr. N got lost on trail yet again. About this point the circle became chaotic…I think Red-headed Steve (one of the Philly marathoners) attempted to nominate Dr. Bruce for r*nning both the NYC and Philly marathons, not to mention a cross-country race that morning. The crowd didn’t buy it, however, and instead made Steve drink for pointing in the circle. Then Steve got another down-down, for being AOTW. It seems RHS was seen terrorizing a flock of geese near the pond in Morningside Park. But wait, there was more….Steve got his wish to sic Dr. Bruce, when said doctor was caught with a numbered race bib under his overshirt, which of course was worthy of a down-down.
At this point announcements were made, and Red-headed Steve was at it again. He made the announcement that Buffs were on sale. The problem was that Hot Rod is the NYCHHH haberdasher…RHS is rather the GGFM haberdasher, with both having the Buffs in their inventory. The haberdashery fight was soon over when everyone shouted down RHS and directed shoppers’ attention to Hot Rod.
The drinking of course continued. Unfortunately there was a seemingly interminable wait for pizza, but it finally arrived as well. The crowd slowly dwindled, but with that great deal previously mentioned, the beer continued to flow. Later on at a table with one MD and two PhDs, some novel research was being made. I have no idea why this was discovered, but it was either Dr. Bruce or Dr. Boozer (Anna, and yes that’s her real name) that made a startling and somewhat frightening observation. It turns out that if you place one of those clear plastic beer cups flush against your ear, and Lunch is anywhere in the vicinity, his voice is crystal clear, with all other noise of the crowd dimming to a whisper. True to scientific method, everyone at the table proceeded to test the theory. I’m not sure which was more strange: the bizarre power of Lunch’s voice, or the look of everyone at the table with beer cups on either side of their heads…