BH3 #260

Brooklyn Hash House Harriers

October 28, 2002

Run #260

On In: The Gate

Hare: Geoff “Steamer” Baldwin

Scribe: The Saint


Ass backwards!  That’s no way to set a trail or, quite honestly, the way to run one but this scribe seriously delayed due to a conference call with a few Australian blokes – who were likely drinking from their Fosters oil cans on the beach at 9:30 in the morn – while we debated with them from a cold New York conference room. – had to run backwards to earn his beer.  Fortunately the pack was way back due to a 7:30P start due to the bloody “EFF” train being Ffing late.  Ass backwards!  Is that any way to run a city?


Speaking of running a city, how about the 2012 Games here in NYC!  Quite an opportunity to hash with our brethren from all over this globe!  Quite an opportunity to ponder how many new running spaces and places there will be, potholes filled, and even trains on time.  Quite a lot of fodder for anyone who writes, to have this for a subject, at least until 2005 or whenever the finalist is chosen.


Speaking of competition, this run rite-up will feature an inaugural column:  EWA’s unbiased, vociferous On In ratings as interpreted by your scribe. Humble readers, you will all recall, that Ewa voiced a few concerns about the On In for Run #259 but LOVED our version of a 19th hole for #260.  Curiosity is in this Scribe’s blood so upon further investigation and heavy detective work the reasons for this were determined.  Sort of a regression analysis for happiness for Ms. Ewa, if you know what I mean.  Now we all know that Ewa is very vocal, eschews obfuscation, is strongly opinionated and, most important, is an ambience kind of gal.


Detailed below are Ewa’s ratings and mine for comparison for the past two BH3 runs, deep thought and extensive discussion.  I must state that certain parties in the publishing biz have already approached this writer with extremely lucrative book offers for a full set of ratings.  Just in time for 2012.  I’ll be lunching in the Pool Room at the 4 Seasons to discuss and will advise.  Thus here we go for runs #s 259 and 260.


Unbiased, Vociferous On In Ratings*

Turkey’s Nest

Oct 14, 2002

                                    EWA                                                               The Saint


Ambience                       1                                                                         2.5

Beer Selection               3                                                                            2

Beer Pricing                  3                                                                             3

Local Color                    1                                                                         3.5

Jukebox                         2                                                                           4

Totals                            2                                                                         3.0 


*Categories are self-explanatory unless you’re dim.  Ratings are the sole province of the writer and if you don’t agree, you don’t agree.  Five (5) point scale with 5 exemplary.


Unbiased, Vociferous On In Ratings*

The Gate

Oct 28, 2002


                                    EWA                                                               The Saint


Ambience                       5                                                                          2.5

Beer Selection               4                                                                            5

Beer Pricing                  4                                                                             3

Local Color                    5                                                                          2.5

Jukebox                         4                                                                           2

Totals                          4.4                                                                          3  



As for the run, it happened with few infractions along the trail but some humor nonetheless from an old stalwart from a sister borough and Grand Poobah of their Hash.  Any guesses?


The biggest surprise was Crofty’s high jump prowess resulting in a down down and likely fertile and feral memories for this most recent feat by The Body.  Not exactly a Fossberry Flop as reported by an unnamed hasher (moved by the Feds into the witness protection program in Vermont), but impressive nonetheless.  Perhaps Mr. Body will be on someone’s Olympic Team reprising Eddy the Eagle for the Mother Country of many a BH3 hasher!  Ass Backwards indeed!


For two BH3 runs in a row, Steve has appeared although he was considerably less vocal this time.  He did impress the crowd with his ability to eat pizza with his tie rakishly thrown (I use the same technique in the loo) over his shoulder to avoid pizza grease.  We are not sure although there are reports that as the night wore on, the tie wore some huile de mozzarella.  No progress apparently delivering his Whoremaster responsibilities.


Perhaps the BH3 should also compile a book of pizza ratings considering that research on Za consumption of NYH3 and BH3 souls indicates we eat it 2.3 times week.  Barring duplication that means apx. 100 pizza joints per year just from hashing.  Knowing the diets of this group, I’d venture that stat could be doubled.  Few humans alive eat that much pizza and there must be some knowledge amongst us that could be monitized.  Volunteers apply at the window.



On Out!