G2FMH3 Hash #182 – Friday, August 11, 2006
Hares: Yank It and Fire in the Piehole
Start: West 125th and BroadwayOn In: Roadhouse at Amsterdam Avenue and West 109 Street
Punk Ass Bitch (Scribe):Joe Pennsylvania
A hash took place under a full moon on Friday evening of the 11th of August. The hash commenced at West 125th and Broadway.
You know you are in for a long trail when the hares arrive at the start sweating like cats in a Chinese restaurant and start chugging down the Gatorade like it was a down-down. The trail went west towards the river, north on 12th Avenue to a check, which was solved north, up to a flight of stairs that I think was called something like “Urine and Homeless Person Alley”, through a neighborhood whose residents were thoroughly confused by a bunch of out-of-neighborhood runners yelling “On-on”, back down Riverside Drive through Grant’s Tomb where Ulysses S. Grant, the 18th President of the United States is buried, through Riverside Park in the dark and through its many puddles and patches of mud, up to Riverside Drive, around Columbia University, over to Morningside Park in the dark for what seemed like an eternity, then over to the Roadhouse. A good, long run (much, much longer for hash brother Robert – more on him below).
Has there ever been an instance where a bartender was exponentially more loaded than the most inebriated hasher in attendance? This young lass was completely soused. She was so bad, that the owner had to personally call a moment of silence in the bar to announce that he was sorry for the poor service. Despite this, Roadhouse proved to be a nice setting for our little evening. This hash extended the GGFM streak of hash cash lasting well into Saturday morning to at least three.
Eventually JM Cockstar, sporting an exceptionally white dress for the occasion – like Caspar the Ghost white –, called the crowd up for the dispensation of down-downs. The hares received a double dispensation, one for the trail and one for failure to set the hotline. Visitor Tampon Drizzle, TD for short, from Minneapolis received a dose of fine NYC draught beer. Devo, the FRB, for forgetting about us in the back of the pack took one down. Blast from the past hashers Leo and Jessie were next. Bottom was bestowed a down-down for finding a friend in the middle of the woods in Riverside Park.
Ed Lunch was called up for sleeping on the closed pedestrian/bicycle walkway at the base of the George Washington Bridge after last Sunday’s NASS in Hoboken. Turns out that Ed drove to the Manhattan side of the bridge, parked his car there, and rode his bike all the way to Hoboken in order to save the $6 toll. When he returned to the bridge, the passageway was closed and Ed slept right at the base of the pathway like a homeless person until it opened again at 5AM.
Robert, who after getting lost during Wednesday’s NYC3 and running an extra two miles, incredibly got even more lost at this GGFM. He ran all the way down to 84th Street desperately seeking chalk marks, then back to the start to find the location of the On-In (as mentioned above, the hotline was not timely set), then all the way to the Roadhouse. After running an extra two miles on Wednesday, he ran an extra four just two days later. That earned him a well deserved down-down. Someone enroll this guy in Hashing 101!
Gabriel was awarded the random abuse of power and chose to mete out such power on Wet Connection.
Cockstar then announced that we are all welcome at Fast American Dave’s summer residence and provided those in attendance with his summer residence phone number.
The party continued on until the wee hours of Saturday morning. Lot’s of 80sish music. “Kiss” by Prince, “I Touch Myself” by the Divinyls (lyrics below), and even Eddy Grant’s “Electric Avenue”. There was even a session of ass grinding involving Jenn and Bottom.
My notes became harder and harder to read, your scribe finally departed sometime after 2AM with many hashers still in full swing (amazingly, the bartender was still standing), Ed Lunch slept in his own bed, and GGFM #182 joined its 181 predecessors in the annals of hashing history.
Lyrics for: I Touch Myself
I love myself
I want you to love me
When I'm feeling down
I want you above me
I search myself
I want you to find me
I forget myself
I want you to remind me
I don't want anybody else
When I think about you I touch myself
I don't want anybody else
Oh no, oh no, oh no
You're the one who makes me happy honey
You're the sun who makes me shine
When you're around I'm always laughing
I want to make you mine
I close my eyes
And see you before me
Think I would die
If you were to ignore me
A fool could see
Just how much I adore you
I get down on my knees
I'd do anything for you
I don't want anybody else
When I think about you I touch myself
I don't want anybody else
Oh no, oh no, oh no
I want you
I don't want anybody else
And when I think about you I touch myself
Ooh, oooh, oooooh, aaaaaah
On out.