Knickerbocker Hash House Harriers


Founded by Wet Connection, Noah’s Dinghy and Mean Jean the Down-down Machine in January 2009 in response to the ever increasing need of NYC hashers to always have something to do.  Sadly, the Knickerbocker was laid to rest in May of 2012.

Then one fateful night in October of 2012, something rose from within the Knickerbocker, with a need so great it throbbed and pulsed.  That need was born out of having nothing better to do on a Wednesday night and a blatant disregard for the possibility of drinking at a bar without all the complicated mess of hashing to get there.  What A C*nt!, seeing that nobody else was going to take care of this problem, took it upon herself to raise that which had lain dormant.  Employing the help of a gay man, two hot chicks and Cheeky Bastard, she vowed to make whatever strokes necessary to keep it up until its climax in the spring.

The mismanagement of the Knick then became centered around the idea that Wednesday hashes should be simple and easy to get to (hello, downtown Manhattan!), and should employ the use of many songs and lots of bare butts.  The season culminates in the Knick’s only special event, the “Knickerbocker in your Knickers,” just for folks who’ve always dreamed about r*nning around Manhattan in their underwear.


The Knickerbocker H3 runs every other Wednesday (alternating with the NAWW) during the winter months, from October to April.

To hare for the Knick, contact our Hare-raiser, What a C*nt!.

Receding Hareline (Next 90 Days)

Never hashed? Wondering what this is all about? Click here...

Date/Time Start / Transit Info Subway/LIRR/Metro North/Path Hare(s)
Long Islands 109 Trails to Heck!
LIL #109
Start: The Semi-Annual Amityville Horror Hash. Amityville Train Station.  
NYC Marathon Hash
NYC #1925
Start: 96th and 5th
Transit: 6/Q to 96th St
Sign up to hare!
NYC #1927
Start: 72nd St Track (UWS)
Beer Mile Rules:
  • Each competitor drinks four 12oz beers and runs 8 laps (it's a 200m track), start - beer, then 2 laps, then beer, then 2 laps, then beer, then 2 laps, then beer, then 2 laps
  • Beer must be consumed before the lap is begun
  • Beer must be a minimum of 5% alcohol by volume. Hard ciders and lemonades will not suffice. The beer must be a fermented alcoholic beverage brewed from malted cereal grains and flavored with hops.
  • Hashers who vomit before they finish the race must complete one penalty lap at the end of the race

24th Polar Bear Hash
Brooklyn #1058
Start: Coney Island
Come run a trail around Coney Island, then an optional dip in the ocean. Bring hash gear, swim gear and warm clothes for after!

Mis-Management 2019-20

Grand Master

Religious Advisors

  • Geordi La Foreskin
  • What a C*nt!
  • Foreign My Twat

Hare Raiser

  • What a C*nt!

Mis-Management 2018-19

Grand Master

Religious Advisors

  • Geordi La Foreskin
  • What a C*nt!
  • Drop a Pin, Slip it In

Hare Raiser

  • Metrosweatual

Past Mis-Management


  • Mandatory Fun, Grand Master and Hare Raiser
  • Cosmopolitits, Grand Maitresse
  • Geordi La Foreskin, Religious Advisor
  • What a C*nt!, Religious Advisor


  • Geordi La Foreskin, Grand Master
  • Cosmopolitits, Religious Advisor
  • Piece o’ Slut, Religious Advisor
  • Massive Load, Religious Advisor
  • Mandatory Fun, Hare Raiser
  • Krispy Kringle, Scribe
  • Young and the Wristless, Fluffer


  • Geordi La Foreskin, Grand Master
  • Mouth Full of Gu, Religious Advisor
  • Turd Dimension, Religious Advisor
  • Mandatory Fun, Hare Raiser
  • Krispy Kringle, Scribe
  • The Young and The Wristless, Fluffer


  • What A C*nt!, Grand Maitresse
  • Cheeky Bastard, Vice Master
  • Geordi La Foreskin, Religious Advisor
  • Mouth Full of Gu, Religious Advisor
  • Turd Dimension, Religious Advisor
  • Mandatory Fun, Hare Raiser


  • What A C*nt!, Grand Maîtresse
  • Cheeky Bastard, Vice Master
  • Irish Spring, Religious Advisor
  • One Tequila, Two Tequila, Three Tequila, WHORE!, Religious Advisor
  • Mouth Full of Gu, Hare Raiser


  • What A C*nt!, Grand Maîtresse
  • Irish Spring, Religious Advisor
  • Cheeky Bastard, Religious Advisor
  • One Tequila, Two Tequila, Three Tequila, WHORE!, Religious Advisor
  • She Likes it in the Benjamins, Hare Raiser


The JM trifecta
Wet Connection
Noah’s Dinghy
Mean Jean the Down-down Machine

Latest KH3 Writeups

KH3 #25 – Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me The On-in (2)

Knickerbocker Hash House Harriers #25 Wednesday 10 November 2010 Start: Merchant’s Gate – Columbus Circle On-In: Dublin House Hares: Crawl-a-holic and Just Peter T. Scribe: Mickey Mouth   From KH3 and New York City, this is, Wait Wait Don’t Tell me the On In! The KH3 write up. I’m Wet Connection and here’s your host, Mickeeeeeeyyyyyyy Mouth (the crowd ROARS!!)   “Thank you WC, and thanks everybody. We had such a fantastic time here last year, we thought, what the heckaroo, let’s do it again! We got a great write up for you today. We’ll be talking about the trail, the on-in, the foibles and peccadilloes and hilarity that ensued. So give us a call at 212-HASHNYC. It’s time to welcome our first listener-contestant.” “Hi Mouth, I’m Yank It from NYC.” “Yank It, Welcome. You sound British.” “Indeed. You have quite an ear for the obvious.” “Don’t the British have a dry sense of humor? ” “Actually, Mouth, we use pounds and pence…” Silence. The crowd ROARS! “Oh, so we are going to get Riel are we!?  (some of the audience chuckles). That’s Riel folks, R-I-E-L. (audience bursts out lauging!). Ok, welcome to the show. Let me introduce you to our panel. You don’t want to be on her bad side when she’s in a ‘don’t draw me any sunflowers’ mood…and she can be seen with the UPSmen doing What can Brown does…it’s Mean Jean the Down Down Machine!!” (Applause!)  “Also say hello to our Man in the Sheets…spread sheets that is. And there is living proof of that. Say hello to Just Rich!” (Applause!) “And finally, to man...

KH3 23 In 1980

Knickerbocker Hash House Harriers #24 Wednesday 27 October 2010 Start: The Cube at Astor Place On-In: Plug Uglies Hares: Just Peter Scribe: Mickey Mouth   In 2010, Just Peter turned 30 and hared the Knickerbocker Hash House Harriers #24. In 1980, Just Peter was shoved out of his mother’s womb. Also kicked out of the womb in 1980 were Mccauley Caulkin, Kim Kardashian, Ryan Gosling, Christina Ricci, Alicia Keys and a host of other people that I also have no idea about. Sometimes the hash is filled with people I don’t know, but not so much the KH3. In 1980, on the island of Vanuatu, John Frum’s cargo cult declared secession as the nation of Tafea. Just as lost and crazy as that sounds, was Mean Jean’s face when she walked up to the hash. Her thoughts? please please please please please let there be people I know here please please please.   In 1980, Richard Pryor was badly burned trying to freebase cocaine. Just like Mr. Pryor, Peter’s trail went up in smoke. There was rain, but this young man was adamant – I only use chalk!! He stomped and sputtered. Ah, youth and their folly. But a good hasher stepped up in his cape and large P on his chest and proclaimed! “never fear! Penn Joe is here!” and set a live-ish trail. In 1980, Rosie Ruiz won the Boston Marathon, only to be exposed as a fraud and stripped of her award. The On-in was Plug Uglies. Plug Uglies is not a New York gang as is popularly thought, but a Baltimore gang in the mid-1800’s....

KH3#19 – It Was Good

Knickerbocker Hash House Harriers #19 Wednesday 10 March 2010 Start: 110th and 7th On-In: Bar East Hares: Fire In The PieHole, Tit-Totaller, with special guest 69Down Scribe: Mickey Mouth When a hash is good – good hares, good run, good on-in, good food – when a hash is just all around good, there is really nothing to write about. Good doesn’t make a story. Luckily, I am still not at the age, to paraphrase Mr. Clemens, where I can’t remember stuff that didn’t happen. The Briss Trail As you all should know too clearly, I am a completely useless individual, being that my hamstrings are more fucked than Wanchai in the ‘40s. So I found out where the on in was and made a calculating decision not to trudge half way around the world – otherwise known as the UWS – and instead met the hares for bag duties at the bar. And I did, 69down and Fire in the PieHole showed up right on time and we lugged the 30 or so bags into Bar East. We Will Need Something To Protect Us! Do You Have a Knife? I Have a Spoon. The ******* trickled in and skipped over the water that I held it close, afraid that if I let it go, it would turn to beer. Because you see, I attempted what was heretofore thought to be impossible! A sober hash. A sober hash?! What? Yes, you read right. More difficult than The North Face! More fearsome than Cerebus! More challenging than staying sober at a hash! Wait…. So they trickled in and proclaimed the hash...

KH3#17 – Noah’s Dinghy Lark

Knickerbocker Hash House Harriers #17 Wednesday 10 February 2010 Start: Waverly and Mercer On-In: Josie Woods Hares: Noah’s Dinghy and US Marine Whore Scribe: Mickey Mouth Noah’s Dinghy LarkFrom WikipediaThe Free Encyclopedia For other references, see Knickerbocker H3, Chosen People Noah’s Dinghy Lark is the Hash that, according to the First Epistle of Mickey Mouth, advanced ordinary hashers to Chosen. The First Epistle of Mickey Mouth, chapters 4 and 5, tells how the hubris of Noah’s Dinghy tested the hashers in a monstrous storm. Noah’s Dinghy was a righteous man but in an act, a lark, tried to build a hash in the face of insuperable weather. The hashers survived this ordeal and were hence known as the Knickerbocker Chosen.  ContentsChild’s PoemNoah’s Dinghy Lark in Later Traditions                Pre-DownDown Tradition                Post-DownDown Tradition  Child’s PoemThe Lord said to Noah’s Dinghy there’s gonna be a galey galey Lord said to Noah’s Dinghy there’s gonna be a galey galey Get those hashers (clap!) out on the traily traily Hashers of New York The Lord said to Noah’s Dinghy you’re gonna set a hashy hashy Lord said to Noah’s Dinghy you’re gonna set a hashy hashy Set it in the (clap!) snow mashy mashy Hashers of New York The hashers, they came in they came in by twosies twosies hashers, they came in they came in by twosies twosies Hot Rods, Mean Jeans (clap) Wet Willy and Lesleys LesleysHashers of New York.  It snowed and snowed for near two daysies daysies Snowed and snowed for near two daisies daisies Hashers couldn’t find (clap!)The trail through the hazy hazyHashers of New York The Beer it flowed out and sated all...

KH3 #15

Knickerbocker Hash House Harriers #15 Wednesday 13 January 2010 Start: 40th Street and Queens Blvd On-In: Irish Rover @ 28th Ave and 38th St Hares: Smashmouth Guest Scribes: Just Rich and Alfred, Lord Tennyson Mickey was absent at this week Knickbocker, so whilst you will no doubt miss the maniacal musings of Mouth you’re stuck with me! I arrived late to the start to be informed by Smashmouth that he’d forgotten to give full instructions to the hash. “Look for a K and a N”, he shouted. “They’ll be questions at the end. Tell the others!” So with this most random of thoughts in my head and joy in my heart I set off in search of a trail and some beer… Miss Mouth had asked me to be inventive with the write up and for some reason I’ve got The Charge of the Light Brigade* by Alfred, Lord Tennyson stuck in my head and can’t think of any original prose.…. Half a league, half a league, Half a league onward, All in the valley of Queens Ran the two dozen "Forward, the Hash! "Charge for the bar!" Smashmouth said: Into the valley of Queens Ran the two dozen. "Forward, the Hash!" Was there a man dismay’d? Not tho’ the hash knew Smashmouth had blunder’d: Their’s not to make reply, Their’s not to reason why, Their’s but to do and die: Into the valley of Queens Ran the two dozen. Bum to right of them, Hobo to left of them, Drunk in front of them Volley’d and thunder’d; Storm’d at with shout and yell, Boldly they ran and well,...

KH3#14 – Experimental Theatre

Knickerbocker Hash House Harriers #14 Wednesday 30 December 2009 Start: Warren Street and East Broadway On-In: Kelly’s Hares: Wet Willy and Jon the Taller Scribe: Mickey Mouth   Welcome, welcome! To the KH3 Experimental Theatre! I’m Mickey Mouth, your Emcee. Tonight we have open mike night, theme is KH3 #14, so all you talented hashers, come on up and show us your stuff! (Noah’s Dinghy comes out and hands Mouth a piece of paper) Okay! First up, we have Fast American Dave! Give it up!   FAD: (walks on stage, one hand holds a guitar, the other a pint of ale, with a little red straw in it. He sits on the stool, puts the beer down, and adjusts the microphone…) Good evening folks. My name is Fast American Dave and most of you know me as the Front Running Bastard. What you may not have known, is that my true passion, my first love, is singing. Why do you think I run so fast? To get out to where I can let my voice be free and flood over the countryside. Tonight I will be singing about the run…here it goes…it’s a ballad…hope you enjoy it…   Way down south on Warren, they huddled against the cold. Only Fireman Tim and the Pie Hole were that bold. Oh…testicles of steel. The hares they set us off, 69down to Mean Jean, Let’s run hand in hand, this way the path will be seen. Oh…it was a deal. I forgot, that at the start, a homeless man took the mike. He tried to get our money, then he tried for...
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