NYCH3 #1374

NYCH3 #1374

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Hare: Trips and Balls

Start: 28th and 2nd

On-In: Kelly’s Sports Bar, Houston and Avenue A

Scribe: Finger F***ed


Sh*t sh*t sh*t.  Due to the ineptitude of the MTA, I was running late.  Surely I was to miss the start of Trips and Balls’ birthday hash, and would be forced to run with my bag.  Thankfully, because the hare felt a need to freshen up a bit (more on that later), a large pack was still waiting at the start when I rolled in about 20 minutes late.


Splat was struggling to give a chalk talk without having any chalk, and everyone in the pack was wondering where our hare could possibly be.  Finally she came dashing across 2nd Avenue, freshly showered, and handed out chalk and sent the pack on its way.


The trail meandered around the Murray Hill/Gramarcy DMZ, looping around to the East River and then back west towards Madison Square Park, then east again to Stuy Town.  One of the hashers I was running with (who will remain nameless because of blatant short cutting) decided that any trail which went in to Stuy Town must come out, and went to go look for the trail on 14th.  I soldiered on through the overpriced rentals and met up with our mystery hasher again at 14th and B.


From 14th Street it was a quick jaunt through the East Village down to the on-in, Kelly’s Sports Bar, where the good beer was flowing (Goose Island!) and hashers were bullsh*tting with each other.  Before long our religious advisors called the circle together to dispense with this week’s down downs:


Trips and Balls, our hare, was honored for her trail, which could be described sh*tty.  Naturally.


Virgins – there were three.  Welcome!


Visitors – Sister Belinda from the Madrid hash, who had the most earsplitting whistle known to man.  She then proceeded to blow said whistle in the bar.


The team Sweet Action, comprised of the lovely ladies of the hash, for their spectacular showing at the Ragnar Relay.


Trips and Balls, for being born 28 years ago.


Casey, for having a tattoo with a typo.  In his defense, it is in Hebrew, so I wouldn’t have noticed.  If you ask me, he should have gotten a down-down for having a tramp stamp.


And finally, Trips and Balls was named AOTW for her performance at the beginning of the trail.  She was late because she showered, and then proceeded to hand out all of her chalk to the runners and thus could not write the on-in location at the start.  Her reasonable solution?  Writing the on-in location on a scrap of paper and sticking it in a tree. 


Pizza came, and a ravenous horde descended upon them, and more beer and more beer was consumed.  Using the excuse of an early meeting, I slipped out into the night as the hash cash expired, but the bar remained full celebrating the birthday girl.