Brooklyn Hash House Harriers
April 11, 2005
Hares: Mean Jean + Karen Z.
Start: Carroll Street station on the F line
On In: Angry Wades
Despite, the inevitable alcoholic haze that sets over me at one point or another during the Brooklyn Hash, I’ve learned a few things generally hold true…
- It seems to rain a lot.
- It seems to rain whenever I set a trail.
- The more likely it is to rain, the more people attend. Brother and Sister Hasher like to wet their whistles one way or the other.
That said, the weather yesterday was the best I have ever seen at the start of the Brooklyn hash, which is probably because I started hashing in November. Sunny and cool, just a hint of a breeze in the air, it was a perfect night for the better beer hash, and this pessimistic hasher was fully expecting a turnout smaller than, ummm…..Queens.
Fortunately, I was wrong and we had a lovely turnout, just lovely. At the start and ready to run were Brooklyn Regulars; Wet Connection, Hedgehog, Dave Byron Brown, Steve and Eva, and of course the inimitable Fluffy. Jumping Jack Gash showed up and kept on telling people that he used to live around the corner 40 years ago, but no one was really listening. Dave Croft was mysteriously absent, leading some to surmise that Byron Brown had done away with him after their trip out to Shea earlier. New to the Brooklyn hash was Kim who last I saw was lurching out of White Horse Tavern early that morning after the craziness at Fast American Dave’s. Also new to Brooklyn was that Nurse from Cali and of course Erica who arrived last and mysteriously lacking one shoe.
Apparently Erica had managed to get into some sort of shoving match with a pregnant woman on the F train, but just before it pulled out of Carroll Street and the doors closed, she was shoved out the door by the pregnant woman’s five year old. Unfortunately, her foot with shoe attached was lodged between the closing doors, leaving poor Erica one legged and screaming her head off as she was afraid the train would pull out and take her with it. As one would expect, not a single person helped her out.
Fortunately, our damsel in distress managed to rescue herself (take that Lois Lane) though not with both shoes which brings us back to her walking to the start as if nothing at all was out of the ordinary. After we were done making fun of her, Steve disengaged himself from Eva long enough to loan Erica a pair of shoes that had to be older than me. Later on, he demanded they be returned and forced her to go buy new ones somewhere on Smith Street. What a gentleman.
Karen was at the start to meet us, but I can’t tell you where cohare Mean Jean was. No doubt she stopped in at a few of the bars her trail went past.
Karen told us she thought it might be 3 and you’re on and that falses could be marked and pointed us on our way and off we went. I started running with Steve who was apparently damaged from some trouble this weekend at the NY/CT AGM. Something to do with Shiggy. I have no idea what that is since I never leave the city.
We reached a check near the BQE overpass pretty quickly and soon we were joined by the rest of the pack who couldn’t find a freaking mark anywhere. Fortunately, after 15 minutes or so, me and Steve stumbled across an arrow (much to our surprise), called “On One” and I assume the rest of the pack followed us.
From there the trail went back through Carroll Gardens and into Cobble Hill with a couple of jumps over the BQE for good measure. We crossed Atlantic and worked our way through Downtown Brooklyn where there the trail unfortunately veered away from many nearby bars. Soon, we were going down Bond Street where apparently the better beer got to Jean as there were marks all over the damn place and messages scrawled in chalk. Jean claimed it all made sense, but the markings indicated a knowledgeable hasher may have been involved. Perhaps the missing Dave Croft was behind this mischief? On-On.
At this point the trail was getting a bit long and I wanted a beer as much as you want to stop reading this thing. We passed plenty of good bars and ended up in the housing projects not far from Smith Street with another semi difficult check. This one only took a couple of minutes to solve and it was at this point that the rest of the pack made their first appearance in ages as Hedgehog and Gash were picking up steam, perhaps smelling beer near. A few more arrows led us a couple of blocks from the start to Angry Wade’s which has the best freaking popcorn, great beer specials, and a whole bunch of hipsters who were pretty much like what the fuck?
Sooner or later everyone showed up, I wasn’t really paying much attention to tell you the truth. At one point, Wet Connection sauntered over and very quietly Ollie Ollied and we circled up. The Down Downs were…
Virgin Brooklyn Hashers Kim, Erica and Nurse Girl
Eva for wearing pink shorts which probably illuminated the trail well. Drag queens don’t own as much pink clothing as Eva!
I think Byron Brown got one for going to the Mets game or ditching Crofty. I was hitting on some hipster chick at this point (We’re a drinking club with a running problem, aren’t we charmingly irreverent?)
Finally, Erica was named Shoeless In Brooklyn. It may have been changed later on to Shoeless Erica. My vote is for Shoeless In Brooklyn. I’ll vote for anything that calls attention to my home borough.
Sooner or later, pizza arrived. Hash cash almost lasted longer than the hashers, but we shoved a few bucks in the juke and Karen, Kim, Shoeless, Nurse Girl, and myself downed a lemon drop, killed our beers and we were on-out.
And there is only one way I can end this isn’t there?
Fuck Me I’m Gay.