The Truth
Official Organ of the Greater Gotham Full Moon
Hash House Harriers
G2FMH3 Hash #206 – Friday, February 29, 2008
Leap GFFM
Hare: Greg Hairy Ass assisted by Scooter GleasonStart: 2nd Avenue and 29th street On-In: Paddy Reilly’s 2nd Ave and 29th
Punk Ass Bitch (Scribe): Fuck Me I’m Gay
As is my custom, I arrived to the start roughly 5 minutes after the pack was sent off, received minimal direction from the hares (Greg Harry Ass sort of grunted and pointed to the south) and away I went into the freezing cold wind swept, once every 28 years Leap GGFM.
The trail started on the corner of 2nd Avenue and 29th St (2-29, hah!) and headed South. Surprisingly, the trail was poorly marked early on, something that to the best of my knowledge has never happened on a trail co-hared by Scooter, founder of the legendary Scot Gleason Academy of Trail Setting (your humble scribe is a member of the inaugural class of 2005).
For the record there are several core tenets of the program; amongst them are
1. Place no less than 3 marks per block
2. 1 mark on each corner on each side of an intersection
3. Marks should be clearly visible
4. Place no less than 3 marks per block
5. 1 mark on each corner on each side of an intersection
6. Marks should be clearly visible
For the first mile and a half, the trail had on average one somewhat visible mark every block and a half in clear violation of the central tenets. Sadly, ignorance of this rule or lack of respect for it, are the primary reasons people are remanded to the Gleason Academy. As it turned out, not surprisingly Greg Hairy Ass was responsible for this poor trail setting and he has since been sent off to our friend Scooter for “re-education”.
Anyway, eventually I hooked up (so to speak) with Lesley and we managed to blunder our way through the first part of the trail until we reached a boob check on the corner of something or other, duly manned by what I would soon realize was pretty much the entire pack with the exception of the visiting Mickey Mouth who for some reason thought that the next mark would be about a mile south at Delancy Street. Lauren and Junkie Monkey were also absent, apparently solving the check; though Lauren would wander off to parts far astray herself later in the trail.
From the boob check, we proceeded through the projects around east 8th street and from there some of us crossed the FDR headed south and then as thanks were rewarded by a back check leading north. Meanwhile those of us who thought we were so clever for not crossing the FDR proceeded to run ourselves into a parallel dead end and followed up this bit of genius by trekking all the way out to Avenue C and then back across to the FDR at 18th St. Myself, Marybeth, Norma, and some other people I’ve forgotten were part of this intrepid group. Sooner or later we crossed the highway again and ended up about a block south of the prelube at some bar. I assume someone knows the name of it and it appears at the top of this page. By someone, I mean U.S. Marine Whore.
Whatever it was called, it was a spacious place, so of course we were crammed into some back room with no ventilation. Beer was provided as was some miserable pizza. I’ve forgotten most of the down-downs, but an excellent circle was run by the whore and the empress. I do know that the JMs tried to punish Steamer and I for ordering Guinness (which was clearly offered as one of the beer choices by Greg Hairy Ass) as opposed to Bud Light, the official beer of Flip Cup. Why they tried to punish us is beyond me, but they did so by forcing us to drink our Guinness after which we ordered more, and more and more.
On-Out!
Fuhmig