NYCH3 #1338 Red Dress R*n


Saturday September 19, 2009 – Red Dress Run

Hares: Head-Up-Ass, Punk Ass Bitch, Flabio and SaltLick

A to A: Fontana’s

Scribe: Bulldozer


The high holy day of hashing arrived along with Rosh Hashanah (Happy New Year!!!) and the 12th annual Red Dress R*n produced a large turnout of locals, tourists, virgins, travelers and all manner of people who love wearing a red dress.


For the most part, guys arrived way before the girls and began pre-lubing. Fontana’s is roomy and really set up great for our events, but they need to do something about the bouncer, Kid Rock, who recently had his funny bone surgically removed.  Making all show ID before re-entering the establishment.  Apparently there is also some local ordinance (which he enforced) about painting toenails on the steps leading into the place.  Thankfully ,Headlights (nice calf high red boots with 5” heels) set up a mobile make-up unit and she was busy.


Salt Lick gathered the multitude of visitors, virgins and those curious about chalk marks.

After some manner of instructions, the pack was off north and then west into Little Italy for the feast of San Gennaro, where the crowd had assembled for the Religious Procession in which the Statue of San Gennaro is carried through the streets.  Pausing briefly, we were the warm-up act.  From there, I am guessing it was Spring St to Broadway, across Houston, some time on Bleeker before stopping at the fountain in Washington Square for a group shot. I Feel Tower said “This dress is chaffing my balls”. Not something a guy can say every day. Some of us went through the fountain and we all exited the park to the right of the arch. The trail was designed for maximum crowd exposure and multiple Kodak moments.. Many asked why we were running, what was the purpose. “For you!”  When a group of folks spotted Dr Splat a wee bit behind the leaders, they yelled out “You’re way behind the group.” He replied “I am the group.” Made our way over to Union Square.  Hot chick liked my dress and said it was what they would be wearing on the Emmy’s.  I couldn’t tell you since I don’t watch the Emmy’s. But I believed her. Somewhere on the trail I ran into Red Headed Steve, who was wearing a black wig and sunglasses. He was with his dad (cowboy hat) who was doing his third RDR. RHS shared a hip flask filled with Glenlevit #12 Scotch. Very tasty.  Many visitors, more on that later, including a group from SF. Don Juanabee said “The guys from SF were smokin’.” And indeed they were lighting up and puffing away. Next street I was aware of was heading east on St. Mark’s Place, then south onto either 2nd (or 3rd) before ending up back @ Fontanas.


Beer was Budweiser American Ale and Coors Light, and pizza came later and in waves.

I Feel Tower (wo)manned up with special RDR mementos. Apparently one day The Tower was home alone one day humming, “Why am I waiting, I could be laminating.” The end result was tags w/ hash names on them. We were urged to keep them visible at all times so that if we were even found asleep on the subway on the way home, we could be identified.


The circle was convened by Trips & Balls and Fire-In-the-Piehole


Down Downs

Mr. Red Dress Run – I Feel Tower

Mrs. Red Dress Run – Bjorn (who made his own dress)

Virgins -: Melody, Cindy, Cass, Chris, Kate, Nick, Ventura

Visitors: – Too many to mention individually, so we didn’t and I can’t.

Holy Shit It’s The Red Dress Run – Goodwill Tool

Sexiest Fraulein – Bland In Brain’s Bitch

Best Impression of A Bowery Bum – Ass Ranger

Best Tits – Dr. Splat

Ed Lunch is a Homo Award – Ed Lunch

Best Headlights – Headlights

Worst Vagina – JP

Too Little Too Late – Stewa


We were promised an “insane amount of beer”, so if anyone ended up crazy drunk, there you have it.


On Out


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