NYCH3:  #1195
Sunday, January 14, 2007
Start:  Seventh Ave. & 14th St.
Hares:  Alice (4 wheel drive) and Heather
On-In:  Cody’s
Scribe:  American Dave #6

What in the wide, wide world of sports is a going on here?

The trail
.  First, a warm-up inside Flannery’s.  Alice gave a chalk talk to all of the newbies, and we were off.  Over to the Hudson, then a bit south, then back east as far as Fifth Ave., then back west, then back east, doubling back, back and forth, back and forth. 

I'm tired of you hashers always coming and going, going and coming and always too soon.

Lots of people got lost around Abingdon Square.  I, for one, don’t even know where Abingdon Square is.  Eventually, things started heading south.  We ended up at Cody’s on Spring and Hudson.  A short trail, true, but still a messed up one.

The on in.  The hares were all set up, ready for us when we arrived.

Vilcomen, bienvenue, velcome, come on in.

Two guys (Howard Unger, writer, and Patrick Androde, photographer) from the NY Times were also there.  Some hashers who won’t be named, but whose initials are Andrew and Mary, could not stop “stretching” outside the bar (posing for the photographer).  The hash might be featured in an “Escapes” piece in the paper.  This can only end badly.

Cody’s had the usual steam tables of pasta, etc.  The food wasn’t any good, but there sure was a lot of it.

No, thank you.  Fifteen is my limit on schnitzengruben.

The down downs
.  I’m sure I have a list somewhere.

Excuse me while I whip this out.

The hares.

A visitor—Clerk Jerk from Memphis.  This guy was really into it.

The virgins:  George, a guy from Bushwick who’s a friend of Ass Ranger.  Also Ian, another friend from NJ who looked like Freddie Mercury.  Steve (notes unclear).  Renee from Astoria, and her husband Marios from Cyprus who pretended not to be Turkish.  A Scottish guy named Ross who actually looked like Scottie from Star Trek.

Joe Pennsylvania and new Ian for fashion violations—Sweatin’ to the Oldies and jeans and a flannel shirt, respectively.

Ass Ranger, for a new and particularly stupid form of pack mark.

Young new guy Steve, for successfully hurdling a trash can and catching Alison’s eye.

…is it, ah, twu what they say about the way you people are gifted? Oh, it's twu, it's twu!

Asshole of the week:  Clerk Jerk for showing up at the start a day early and then bugging everyone about it.

The beers lasted long enough for us all to get friendly.  Then, it was time to go.

Well, can't you see that's the last act of a desperate man? — We don't care if it's the first act of Henry V, we're leaving!