July 5, 2006
Start: the plaza outside The Plaza (59th St. and 5th Ave.)
On-In: somewhere on the west side of Broadway between 100th and 101st,
or maybe 101st and 102nd, but it wasn’t Broadway Dive.
Punk-Ass Bitch: Jenn
The start was manned by P*ssy Repellent and no one was sure whether that was a good or bad sign but we were soon waved toward Central Park with a vague ‘there’s a mark over there somewhere’ hand gesture. Conjecture ensued as to which bar on the upper west side would be our final destination.
Maybe the trail was a tad too long for the City’s daily clamminess index but no other complaints could be mounted against C*ckstar’s trail. Unfortunate to have in print, I know, as more than one person declined to say anything positive about the trail because, as they advised others, it would “go to her head” and we “don’t need that”.
Visitor Finger-Licking Good was in from Raleigh, North Carolina. For some refreshing man-on-man action our Joe B. made a virgin named Mark c*m.
Fast American Dave was called out for his new shorts which he needed to buy because he “forgot it was Wednesday” (how could he forget it was Wednesday and why is he always buying new clothes before the hash? Quick trivia bit: How many pairs of new socks has Fast American Dave bought in the previous six months of hashing?) This night he went to Niketown right before trail and bought a pair, size small, but too much…er…eh hem, skin…was showing so he needed to exchange them for a larger size.
Party planner and hostess with the mostest Robert got a little too excited when he realized he was our FRB, better known to Devo as “the winner of the hash”. Our JM’s called Devo up with Robert for a distant-second consolation beer.
Ewa was asked to “drop and give us 20” after earlier bragging that she had done 100 push-ups in the gym before trail. She accomplished the feat to a round of applause and a waiting beer. Wonder what kind of diseases you can catch from a hash-bar floor?
At one point on trail Molly (aka Sure Likes to Ball) followed Steamer into the woods. For knowing better but still following our renegade hasher off trail for who knows what she was made to drink. Molly’s only response: “I’m a risk taker”.
Assh*le of the Week went to Henry who (as usual) was starving and started the run on pizza before we got to circle up. Silly boy left his hat on and quickly got another full glass which (surprise, surprise) after gorging on pizza he had trouble finishing. Good thing for him we felt bad and only gave him half a glass a little while later for no good reason but to torture him.