GGFM #219 – Annual New Moon Hash
Hares: Just Scot (or is he?) ‘Scooter’ Gleason and Crazy Bob
Start: 96th Street & CPW
On-In: Patrick Ryan’s
I thought I could do it. Not having been to a Full Moon Hash for a while, I thought I could get to the start, do the run, sneak past the JMs and loiter at the on-in unnoticed. Didn’t work. So now, here I am, doing the write-up.
Having been bouncing around the apartment for the last several weeks (didn’t I see a H.O.P.S. Email recently?) I thought the weather had turned warm enough for the annual Flashlight Hash. Nothing like an opportunity to run around Central Park at night, in the dark, after an unexpected January thaw. I grabbed Sarah Down Under and took the cross-town bus to the West side and then strolled up to the start. Not a big crowd when we arrived at 7:15. There was Dogface, Joe Pennsylvania, FAD#5, Pussy Repellant and a few newbies. Some familiar faces gradually started to arrive: Trish H, Marie W, Maribeth, Empress Norma, Pussy In Boots, Peter T, Fire In The Piehole, Tit-Totaller, Leslie B and Heather are some that I remembered. Crazy Bob and Scooter Gleason, the Hares, soon checked in and we quickly started to get ready for the run. After a lengthy virgin and visitors chalk-talk, we were informed of some of tonight’s details. The trail was marked in chalk, toilet paper and Organic Ketchup (at least the squirrels and the rats would have delicious condiments this evening). We were also being treated to a YBF check, a back count check and a boob check. Yee Har! Off we went.
The trail started in the Park and soon turned south, along the park wall down CPW. A few twists and turns, on some paths and over some hills, we found our way to the reservoir. After a check, we followed the red arrows and headed north towards the Ramble. A few overland turns, some more up and down hills and across streams towards the loop at Great Hill. I thought the YBF check would be here, but I must have missed it. We exited at another check at 110th Street and Central Park North.
As an experienced Hasher I though we would be heading towards Morningside Park and that’s where we went. A fair choice of locations. As expected, a brief run through the park and the expected Death by 1000 Steps at the end. (Funny, I thought I saw a lot of people in Morningside that night, even a game older lady in a walker heading downhill at the top of the last flight of steps. Good for her.) The trail continued through the Colombia U. campus which always looks good lit up at night. Plus we get to point and laugh at all of the co-eds.
From here, the logical choice was Riverside Park. Yup. A brief foray down hill, into the park and then a turn North, heading up to 125th Street. A quick pass of Grants Tomb* and then east. Running with a few members of the pack, we heard a voice from a window above yell “Down the hill and turn left on Broadway”. A BVN on the sidewalk showed we were on the right track. A few blocks later, we found ourselves at Patrick Ryan’s, approximately 125th and Broadway. Funny, I don’t remember any YBF checks, back checks or boobs on trail. After figuring out which door to go in, we passed a peanut barrel and went downstairs to the basement. At least it didn’t smell like the Back Page. Live music was to start in an hour. Good luck.
Sparky at the bar started to pour pints. Other hashers that I missed at the start arrived – Ingrid, Mean Jean, Eager 4 Beaver, a few more. Still others started to trickle in and a crowd developed. Almost didn’t recognize Peter without his baseball cap. That was soon corrected. Some pretzels, peanuts, people changing clothes in a bathroom lit only with blacklight forced some to go upstairs to find appropriate facilities. I even saw some folks arriving downstairs with a hot dog. Maybe the rumor was true. Soon it was time for the circle (more of a parallelogram actually) led by Tit-Totaller and Empress Norma. The down-downs happened as follows:
- Hares: Scott and Crazy Bob
- Visitors and Virgins: Lee / Eddie / Nick and Brian from Grenada
- I have notes about circling around the pumping station for a meet-up (was that Dan?) (Editor’s Note: Yes indeed, it was Dan Wix who really should be named Pillsbury Ho’ Boy, go ahead, poke him!)
- Again: Dan, for conveniently falling down. Link fell down too, maybe not at the same place.
- Allie: when asked who was collecting Hash Cash, thought to say “The OLD MAN over there”<insert finger pointing at Scooter>. After a few rounds of ridicule, we learned that her HASH name was “Thirsty Bitch”. Not being able to pass that up, Scooter’s demanded that she drink from her muddy sneaker as a penalty. After a loud protest, she did agree to drink from Scooter’s sneaker. She then quietly spent the rest of the evening, canoodling in the lap of her male companion.
- Brian: for being chivalrous and helping the other hashers cross over a field fence.
- Courtney, for believing, like most high school sophomores, that drinking beer from a straw will get you drunk faster. After a three way-from-a-straw comment regarding Allie, Finger Me First and an undisclosed third, she did squeal with delight about her natural Farah Fawcett like curls. I will have to admit, she did wear them well.
- Trish Hoffman, for being perplexed about the matching left and right thigh high bruises she was sporting. After some evaluation, it was decided that the only way she could have gotten them was from over zealously swinging her arms and smacking herself while jumping up and down on her mini-trampoline at home.
- I have some notes about female midget wrestling – not certain who drank for that. (Editor’s Note: Huh?)
- Eager 4 Beaver and Mean Jean were brought up for Junk in the Trunk. They tried to make all the other JM’s drink too. I am not sure if it worked.
- A field nomination was given to Heather who, having succumbed to the current economic crises, decided to use a plastic garbage bag to carry her HASH gear in.
Though some folks did eat some hot dogs, the hares submitted to the vegetarians and ordered a few pizzas and a batch of garlic knots. They were quickly consumed. An announcement was given regarding discounted 1300 r*n T-shirts. Was everyone ready for the Polar Bear Hash scheduled for the next day?
The guitar player did manage to start his set. Some Rolling Stones, Warren Zevon and a comment from Fast American Dave #5 stating that he was here to get f*cked up tonight were the last vocals I remember. There was still a bit of a crowd at the bar and HASH Cash was active. Looks like a number of folks were getting ready to stay for a while. I grabbed Sarah Down Under (not running tonight due to a sore hip) and headed out the door. See you next time. On Out.