BH3 Hash House Harriers
Run #419 / July 28, 2008
Hares: Virgin Hare Jeremy and Dogface
On In: Three Jolly Pigeons
[Disclaimer: if this write-up lacks energy, it is simply because I lack pub crawl pacing skills and have been on the mend ever since the 10 (or was it 11?) bars I visited during the hash's latest pub crawl. Water didn't seem to be an option, so you do the math.
An overall lack of enthusiasm permeated the small pack that gathered at that sad corner of 68th Street and 4th Avenue in Bay Ridge, which leads me to believe that I am not the only one whose pacing skill set needs some fine tuning.
Anyway, those of us present were, undoubtedly, hell-bent on r*nning off the previous day's copious consumption of beer. And r*n we did. In circles.
"Falses are marked…as they should be," our stern veteran hare, Dogface, had informed us while Virgin Hare Jeremy just shrugged and collected our bags. Down by the water, up, up, and up, dragging our tired asses (ok, my tired ass) over the rolling hills of Bay Ridge, where we encountered pink Cadillacs and statues of the Virgin Mary proudly displayed on front lawns.
The circles persisted until we reached the on-in, Three Jolly Pigeons, where the choice of eight draft beers, served by an easy-on-the-eyes bartender, was ours.
Unlike the les Bikram Yoga studio, the Hash, as far as I know, doesn't offer a hardship rate, but fortunately for us devoted Brooklynites, the BH3's hash cash remains at a cool fifteen dollars.
The circle was called, and Blackout took it upon himself to administer the down-downs, first stating (disclaimers are, apparently, common among hashers) that he was the only member of the committee present, protesting that he is 6th down the line. (Sure, like he doesn't delight in leading the pack through his favorite hash tune: "He's got a little tiny penis, but he's alright…)
The punishments were duly given:
-The hares, of course.
-A visitor from Arizona, who upon singing a song titled, "Jesus saves…" and downing his drink, was given a second down-down for the offense of not first removing his hat.
-Rebecca for making a stellar showing at the pub crawl and still running the Eagle.
-When asked for nominations, Laurel brazenly spoke up and reported that Virgin Hare Jeremy had made a new girlfriend at the on-in. Said new gf had about 30 or so years on Jeremy, but maybe being a virgin hare is like having beer goggles.
-Pub crawlers who made it past bar 9. Ok, so no actual down-downs were administered to these folks (and why the hell not, I ask?), but they damn well should have been.
Just Stacey – No Fucking Name Stacey (Aside from introducing the pack to the Jesus song, AZ visitor explained that this is how no name hashers are referred to in his neck of the woods.)