Brooklyn Hash House Harriers
February 2, 2004
On In: Royale (“A New Place”)
Scribe: The Saint
Brooklyn has always been known for its colorful personalities and I must admit despite heaping as much abuse as I feel like on Stephen – all of which he deserves – he can be deemed colorful. He does need a hash name and we will review candidates below. Now why is he “colorful’? First, he is supposed to be the Hash Whoremaster, yet I have yet to find one of those types he is responsible for — at least at a BH3 event. Second, he demonstrates creativity not only in setting trails – this will also be reviewed – but in running (we really meaning shorting) them. Third, he knows not only “In” places but easily gains entry for his friends and fits right in.
The publicity for this hash noted that Stephen never steps foot in Manhattan and I suppose by extension Queens. Come to think of it, I have never seen him anywhere other than Brooklyn. Talk about a homebody but a homeborough! I suppose this is kind of like being a metrosexual known in Brooklyn as a Brookosexual or borosexual.
This hash promised “culcha” which is clearly misrepresentation and idiotic advertising likely based on the simple fact that we started near and ended up running past the Brooklyn Museum of Something.
The pack set off across a main thoroughfare through an ice-coated parking lot to its exit proceeding to a circle jerk in a conveniently located mini-park. Two minutes into this hash. We checked and checked and ultimately it dawned on me that the path must lead off the far end of the jerk park. 12 Minutes into this hash! Paul and I set off in that direction past the famed museum but the path was found ahead of us. Across the same or some other main drag past the museum following long, long arrows. Up a hill past an entrance to Prospect Park – although a few of us followed one of those long thin arrows that semi pointed into the park. Around the park only to be tricked by another check. Some late arrivals must have found it as those of us circling many blocks in all directions came back to it to find a pack mark. Down the hill to the 4th/9th underground (British Dave influence on my scribing) but them where!? All of a sudden a mark appears further down the street and we’re off and round to the pub.
Seems Stephen’s creativity led him to mark several steps down into the metro stop and then up the far side. We got to the pub to find Steamer and some call-in bastards there ahead of us. Steamer found the true trail and congrats to him for figuring out the deviousness of our hare.
The pub, The Royale, was not exactly new as Stephen, The Cardinal, Fluffy and your scribe once had an On In after bagging a trail for three last Fall on a cold and rainy night. That group ex. the writer ended up getting some Czech food or some other Eastern European country fare post that episode and I hoped our food direction would not lead in long thin arrows to that fare.
Speaking of long thin arrows, what else is long and thin? ——- a pencil! Aha, the beginnings of a Hash Name for Stephen. What would be an appropriate noun to add to pencil? Why not DICK? He is after all the Whoremaster and I would guess (surely The Saint does not know) that a dick might be useful to have in the company of you know what.
Unfortunately once suggested with the support of British Dave #3 and some other person of influence from the Brooklyn/NYC Circle, the JDs hesitated noting that they need to caucus, debate and decide. Now New York and Brooklyn have too many politicians seeking to do the politically correct thing, but in this case the evidence is clearly presented in an obvious and straightforward manner. The answer please! If our JMs don’t have the balls to agree —– oops sorry as Tiger’s Woody and Wet Connection come up somewhat shy in this regard – then who does?
MAKE A British Dave CONTRIBUTION: EMAIL ME WITH ALL THE DIRT ON ANY OF THE BDs OR SIMPLY MAKE SOMETHING UP – NO ONE WILL KNOW!